How to Prioritize What Really Matters
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How to Prioritize What Really Matters
With so many demands on our time and attention, it’s easy to get caught up in what others want from us. But the truth is, if we don’t take the time to prioritize what really matters to us, we end up spread thin and stressed out.
The key to living a life that feels fulfilling is being intentional about where you invest your time and energy. Here’s how you can prioritize.
1. Design a “No” List
Let’s face it: We can’t do everything, and we don’t need to. A lot of the time, we get stuck saying “yes” because we feel guilty or want to avoid disappointing others. But here’s the thing—if you say yes to everything, you’re saying no to your own peace of mind. That’s why creating a “no” list is a game-changer.
This isn’t just about saying no to things you don’t like (although, let’s be honest, that helps). It’s about being intentional with your time. Is social media draining you? If so, say no to mindless scrolling. Does overcommitting to events leave you feeling empty? Say no to those too.
By choosing what you’re not going to do, you make room for the things that really matter.
2. Create a “Joy Inventory”
We often get so caught up in daily responsibilities that we forget to focus on what makes us happy. That’s why creating a “joy inventory” is so powerful.
Write down all the activities, people, places, and moments that bring you joy. It could be simple things like having a coffee date with a friend, taking a walk outside, or diving into a creative hobby. Now, here’s the key: Make more time for these things.
Cut out the obligations that drain you and focus on the people and activities that fill you up. You deserve more of what lights you up, and this inventory helps you remember that.
3. Reverse Engineer Your Ideal Day
Ever wondered what your ideal day would look like? Not in some perfect, unattainable way, but what really makes your day feel good and fulfilling?
Take a few minutes to think through what your ideal day looks like. What time do you wake up? What do you do first thing? What activities leave you feeling energized and happy?
Once you know what a perfect day looks like for you, start reverse-engineering your life to make it happen. It might mean prioritizing self-care, setting aside time for creativity, or saying no to busywork that doesn’t move you forward. By focusing on what really makes your day ideal, you set yourself up to make more intentional choices.
4. Use the 80/20 Rule (Pareto Principle) for Life
You’ve probably heard of the 80/20 Rule (Pareto Principle) when it comes to business or productivity. But this rule works in life, too.
It says that 80% of your results or fulfillment come from just 20% of your efforts. So, if you want to prioritize what matters, it’s time to figure out which 20% of your activities or relationships give you the most joy, satisfaction, or success.
Once you know what they are, make those the focus. Let go of things that eat up time and energy without giving much back. This shift in focus can help you spend more time doing what really matters to you and less time on what doesn’t.
5. Prioritize by Energy, Not Just Time
We’re all busy, but not all tasks are created equal. The key is to prioritize by energy, not just time.
Some tasks may only take a little bit of your time but require a lot of mental or emotional energy, while others may not take much energy but lead to big results.
Pay attention to where your energy goes and focus on what truly has a positive impact on your well-being. For example, spending time with people who uplift you or working on a passion project might be less time-consuming but energizing.
On the flip side, checking emails constantly or stressing over small things might drain your energy without making a real difference.
6. Define “Enough”
In a world that constantly tells us to want more—more success, more stuff, more everything—it’s easy to get caught in a cycle of never feeling “enough.” That’s why it’s so important to define what “enough” means for you.
What’s enough in your career? In your relationships? In your finances?
By setting a clear definition of enough, you stop the endless chase for more and instead focus on appreciating and optimizing what you already have. It gives you peace of mind and helps you recognize that you don’t need to do everything or have everything to feel successful or fulfilled. Enough is already in your reach.
7. Embrace Slow-Tracking
Quick wins and instant results are tempting, but they don’t always lead to lasting satisfaction. That’s why I’m a big fan of slow-tracking. This means checking in with your long-term goals every few months to see if you’re making steady progress.
Are you inching closer to your deeper goals, or are you getting distracted by short-term gains? Slow-tracking helps you stay focused on long-term fulfillment and ensures you’re heading in the right direction, even if it takes time. This approach removes the pressure of needing everything to happen fast and lets you enjoy the journey.
8. Prioritize with Future You in Mind
When making decisions—big or small—think about future you. Will this decision help you grow, or will it be a short-term fix that won’t matter in the long run?
When you prioritize with future you in mind, it helps you make smarter choices that align with your long-term vision. Instead of getting caught up in today’s pressures, you focus on what will benefit you down the road. Whether it’s choosing healthier habits, saving for the future, or investing in your personal development, your future self will thank you for the thoughtful decisions you make today.
9. Map Out Your Non-Negotiables
One of the easiest ways to prioritize what matters is by identifying your non-negotiables. These are the things you absolutely cannot compromise on—whether it’s your health, family time, or mental well-being.
When you have a clear list, it becomes easier to make decisions that match with your values. These non-negotiables act as your personal guideposts, helping you stay grounded and focused on what’s truly important. If something doesn’t fit within them, it’s much easier to say no and move forward without guilt.
10. Give Yourself Permission to Evolve
Your priorities are allowed to change. What mattered to you a year ago might not be as important today, and that’s okay. Life evolves, and so do your goals and values.
Give yourself the permission to reassess and evolve with them. This doesn’t mean giving up on your dreams, but it does mean staying flexible and adjusting your priorities as needed. Embrace the process of growth and change, and give yourself the space to shift your focus as you learn and experience new things.